Smart calling, safe surfing

When reaching out to customer service you deserve help from a human, and you shouldn’t have to constantly worry about hackers and scammers. If you’ve just about lost your sanity with the maze of options, the dreaded hold-so-long-they-hope-you’ll hang-up times, and want to make your online experiences safer, I have some tips for that.

Phone hacks for reaching the elusive human customer service agent:

Stay silent. Some systems will time out and send you straight to a human.

If staying silent didn’t work, try saying “representative,” or “real person,” repeatedly, or say random words like “barnacle,” or go all out and say complete nutty sentences, like: “I believe Blufftonians buy the best banana Band-Aids” or do your best mumbling. If the bot can’t understand you, he/she/it will hopefully hand you over hastily to a helpful human.

You can also try pressing various keys to see if that triggers a transfer. The 0 and # keys might just get you auto-transferred, so they’re worth a try. Many systems will automatically transfer to a real person if the fake person can’t figure out what you need.

If all else fails, you might want to take options (if offered) to switch to a live chat, or send an email, or hang up and wait for a call back when you move to the front of the queue.
The best times to call are usually Tuesdays and Wednesdays, mid-morning or mid-afternoon.

Once connected to a real, honest-to-goodness live agent, if you aren’t getting the help you need, you could mention you are thinking about signing up with their competitor. Retention teams are trained to take very good care of anyone who expresses that kind of disenchantment with their company.

Safer Surfing:
You already probably know most of these, but just in case you don’t or need a little encouragement to beef up your security, here are some suggestions.

Use strong, unique passwords and consider using a password manager to keep them secure. I know we all hate keeping track of so many passwords. I wish I could type a password wrong, but almost get it right, and have the words “close enough” pop up.

And, I know it’s sad that we must be so cautious, but two-factor authentication really does help keep your accounts safer.
When you are opening your email, think before clicking. Don’t open attachments from unknown senders, hover over links to see what the actual URL (web address) is before you click, and use the dropdown arrow to see the email of the sender. If the email is supposedly from Staples, for example, but the sender’s email is rudolph@iamabadperson.ru, that’s your clue to block, delete, and report.

On your social media accounts, check your privacy settings and make sure you aren’t oversharing your personal details.
Use anti-virus software and keep your system and apps updated.

Clear browser cookies and tracking data on a regular basis.
Watch your bank statements and credit reports for suspicious activity.

A legitimate company will not ask you for your password, payment information, or social security number over text or email.

Don’t believe it if you get a text or email that says your account is locked.

And finally, and most importantly, if anything you receive demands urgent action, don’t fall for it! That is the biggest con, and unfortunately, it works. If anyone is trying to scare you into doing something that doesn’t feel right, it probably isn’t.
Well, I guess there’s one more final thing that we all know, but I’m going to remind you anyway – if it sounds too good to be true – IT IS.

If you need help understanding any of my tips, there are some fantastic computer professionals out there who can explain all the little details. You can also join the Hilton Head Computer Club for only $30 per year. www.hhicc.org

Tamela is a proofreader and book editor; she hosts paint parties for adults, art and drama camp for kids, and is the art teacher at May River Montessori. www.tamelamaxim.com www.artposseproductions.com