Time travelling in the Lowcountry

Since I don’t cotton to cold one bit, it shouldn’t surprise you one bit that I haven’t wet a line in quite a while. For an outdoor writer and avid angler, these conditions give me a stunned, somewhat blank look whenever I look in the mirror and consider what in the heck could I possibly write about. It wasn’t until I was reminiscing with my daughter Camden that two words popped up. The words were “what if?” As she was growing up, she and I developed a “what if” game on long car trips which always started with those two words. Nothing was out of bounds, with one example being a semi with large letters along its side flips over on us as we skid down the road. We wondered if those letters would be transferred to our squished, flattened bodies. Morbid, I know, but it was her 8-year-old “what if” that inspired this somewhat off the wall column.

  I have always been fascinated with time travel and often consider what it would be like if I was able go back in time here in the Lowcountry with one of today’s boats and all the right tackle. Movies like “The Final Countdown,” where the aircraft carrier the Nimitz is transported back in time to the day before Pearl Harbour was attacked. Could two of its jets thwart the Japanese attack? I love “what ifs” like that. Googling my heart out, I researched this area eons ago and learned some very interesting critters that might make this trip a trip indeed.

  The first thing I would need other than a boat and tackle would be a sturdy trailer because the coastline was a good 60 miles inland from where it now lies. There were no sandy beaches, but rather, the coastline was rocky. Imagine trying to find a launching spot! Even if I were able to find the perfect launching sight, I learned that I sure as heck would need to keep my head on a swivel. I know that most of you that know me think my head is always on a swivel, but more like the girl in the “Exorcist” spitting out green gunk. I didn’t know that Smilodon or saber tooth tigers roamed that area. I also learned that those long fangs were not used to bite and kill prey because they were so big the tiger could not close its mouth on unfortunate critters. They were most probably used for scraping away the hide on things they caught. Another thing to watch out for were herds of Columbian mammoths somewhat akin to elephants, but these giants weighed in at over 20,000 pounds. I can’t wait to ask my daughter “what if” one of these bad boys fell over us and slid along. What a mess!

  Then, there were the ground sloths. Having had a few encounters with sloths in Costa Rica, these were nothing like those slow-moving gentle creatures. Standing at least 13 feet tall and weighing a hefty 10,000 pounds, they had massive claws, but thankfully, they were plant eaters, so I should be ok. But if I were accompanied by a friend that was a vegetarian, he might want to rethink his eating habits. Herds of bison also roamed our area, and extinction took them out, not greedy, great white hunters.

  Now, I have finally made it out on the water. Oddly enough, there was a horseshoe crab scurrying right by my foot. I couldn’t believe it until I read that they have changed little in 150 million years. Crazy, huh? My time trip was really all about fishing, but I had run 60 miles to get to deeper water. As I was running along, a shadow passed over my head. Looking up was the largest bird I had ever seen. Called a Pelagornis Sandersi, its wingspan was nearly 24 feet wide. With small needle-like teeth, it drifted over the ocean, much like today’s albatross. Enough of that. It was time to do some trolling. Using my heaviest tackle and largest lure I had when this massive, and I mean massive, billfish took one of my baits. It was a Xiphiorhynchus Rotundus! Way bigger than any blue or black marlin, it was a good 17 feet long, and instead of one bill, it had two, one on top and one on the bottom that opened and closed like a mouth. I fought that monster for nearly 10 hours, and just when I thought it was spent, up comes a megalodon shark, and in one bite, takes half the marlin! Reaching 60 feet long and weighing upward of 50 tons, I decided then and there it was time to head back to my time. Try playing “what if” sometime. It’s an awesome mind game.    

Collins Doughtie is a 60-year resident of the Lowcountry, is a sportsman, graphic artist, and lover of nature. collinsdoughtie@icloud.com